Nope. To my astonishment and discomfort I quickly identify the writing of (my P.I.T.A.-FIL). This is a man who openly boasts his commitment to calling & sending cards or gifts ONLY when it suits him rather than because the calendar has dictated. He prefers to "give" his tokens reflective of his interests on his schedule. Last year he presented me with a red chiffon apron for Christmas becozzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz................he liked it.
The silver lining here: I will take a USPS delivery any day over a live and lengthy personal delivery scheduled without consideration for any plans or needs of our own.
Back to the "gift": Anyone who understands us, even without having visited our 850sq ft home to 4 people and 2 dogs, knows that space, time, and money challenge us daily. With that said, if asked for Christmas gift ideas, our standing request is for memberships or gift certificates for classes, events, or points of interest. These items require zero storage space and will not be offered at garage sales or in the form of hand me downs.
BUT..........No, really go ahead, design and construct a rocking horse and try to stuff it into a box that is just a tad too small. When you find the box is too small for the handmade rocking horse, rather than getting a larger box, simply saw it in half to make it ready for shipping in the unfit box. Then, proudly boast your creative and thoughtful gesture as you inform your son he will need to put it back together, re-box it, and wrap it for your grandson for Christmas. Because the life of a retired and single man, writing an unsolicited and unfounded "manual"on finding Love and Joy, is so very demanding. He is seriously writing a book on love and joy. (Which reminds me, I have a few more titles of my own to share.) While being a father to 2 toddlers, husband to angry overtired woman and 60hr/week employee of a struggling company offers an abundance of spare time to finish
I would like to wrap this up cleverly or neatly. But in true McGoo fashion, I ask that you do this for yourselves. Feel free to submit your own endings to this pointless entry.
Tired and ranting, I optimistically believe that I am about to turn a corner, folks.
Without Mr. Farking McGoo's sperm, there would be no Andy or Ernie and Bert. I thank him for his contribution in the physical creation of my husband. See, how is that for that positive thinking?