Wednesday, February 3, 2010

What I Meant to Say Wednesday

While wrestling a shrieking Bert who has given himself what we call the "poop speedo"  or "sauce bucket".   Wishing for ear plugs and an extra arm to wipe sweat from my brow as I struggle to change his creamy and copious poop diaper.
What I said Ernie, How about if you wait until I finish changing your brother to tell me about that book?  It will be easier for mommy to hear and answer you.

What I might have thought for one brief moment:   Please oh please be quiet and don't ask,tell, or show me anything for at least 10 minutes.  Nothing.  Just 10 tiny fucking quiet minutes. No, on second thought, make that 10 silent minutes. I promise to immediately resume with our tired and circular Q&A sessions.
Gesturing to the cart return 15 feet away, while pushing my baby in the errant cart which I recovered from the market parking lot,  What I said to the able-bodied and childless woman leaving her cart behind someone else's car:  Would it be OK if I put your shopping cart in that cart return for you?

What I meant to say:  Are you seriously that lazy and oblivious that leaving a cart behind a person's car seems a good idea?

As if it were no problem at all, she responded "Sure". 
And off I went pushing the 2 carts.   Really??

What I said to Andy:  I am going to take my shower.  I will enjoy it more if the kids engage in something outside of the bathroom and even away from the door. 

What I might have liked to say:   If you keep the children happy busy  while I take a shower (and a minute to myself ), I will be more friendly and enjoyable.  And if not, I may lose my shit.

If you feel the need to openly confess and laugh about any passive aggressive treasures of your own, feel free to join in and link up for What I Meant to Say Wednesdays with Chief  and SupahMommy.


  1. I think I might have been way more brutal about that shower request! ;)

  2. while fun and informative, this post.... who gives a shit? right seriously ‹^› ‹(•¿•)› ‹^›

    Just sayin...

  3. nice one, dick. did you just copy and paste my comment right back into my blog. fitting, and still total horseshit. Touché... or in your case douché

  4. ah douche fuck I can't get that symbol. ah copy and paste

  5. I hate the people with their carts...hate hate hate them.

  6. I love it when you and Dick fight. That was even more fun than the post.

    Girls, you're BOTH pretty.

  7. LOVE it! A big UGH on the chick with the buggy.
    May have to play along with ya next time :)

  8. I cannot believe that lady!! That just makes me mad.. what an idiot!!

    And yes the constant talking.. I get it from both at the same time, with my daughter usually at some point yelling "listen to me".. well if you wouldn't both talk nonstop and at the same time I might just do that.

  9. I'm very passive aggressive with my kids when I'm busy and they bug me. I literally sing, 'YES, dear?????'

  10. Screw passive aggressive. Though yours are funny! I would have given the b**ch with the cart what for. With my son standing behind me to back me up of course. Maybe I should make him practice looking menacing??

    At the least I would have made a snide comment, quite loudly, about what a loser she was. I'm just friendly like that.


  11. LOVE this new weekly feature!

    Going to be weekly right? Awesome!


Your thoughts are welcome here. As long as they are kind. Or maybe just not unkind.