Saturday, December 5, 2009

Mr. McGoo

Warning:  This one is angry and employs the f-bomb.

The obliviousness of my husband's father, whom I struggle to call Father In Law, is maddening.  He is Mr. Fucking McGoo.  No clue whatsoever of the wake of destruction he leaves behind.

My FIL is "entrenched" as he likes to say in the writing of his book for the last few years.  He is father to 3 scary daughters who speak neither to him or each other.  Two time ex-husband with a trail of now angry ex-girl friends.  This man sits confidently absorbed(and alone) with his composition titled....  wait for it..... Creating Joy:  Leaving Fear Behind to Find Love. (Me: aiming finger at back of throat gagging and eye rolling  with  furrowed brow and head shaking in agitated judgment) Are you kidding me?  So busy with this "manuscript"(more eye rolls), he will not visit his son for Christmas, the only child of his who speaks to or cares for him and who happens to have 2 small boys called grandsons. He wants to get it to the press before year's end.  Like that will make the difference.  Really?  You are going to write a manual on "Love"  instead of having some?  ugh.  I think I shall  write some books also.  Mine will likely be some of the world's shortest books. I too, shall write on things I know nothing of.

The following is a list of would-be titles by yours truly:
  • Laid Back Parenting 
  • The Spotless Home
  • The Well Rested Mom (which leads to my next title)
  • My Interminable Sex Drive:  911 I Cannot Stop
  • Putting Yourself First
  • My Super Tight Body 
  • Priority Pet Care After Children
  • Extreme Self Confidence
  • The Accomplished Blogger 
  • What Now? On Efficient Time Management:  When Its All Taken Care of.  
  • And with some of my remaining spare time, I just may pen a few on peace and forgiveness.


  1. OMG?? Really... OMG!!!
    What an ass.
    I really don't know what else to say ~
    Creating Joy? That's pretty funny actually.
    And I love the titles of your books. I've seen you do that kind of thing in a previous post, and it's ingeniously funny!!

    And how is it that I NEVER knew this other blog existed? My bad. Yay.. I now get to double my fun over coffee in the morning ;)

    Thanks for blogging, Darlin - the blogoshere is a better place with you in it ;)

  2. Oh, never mind. I've been to this one mostly... but never hit the follow button until today!!! Geesh, I'm losing my mind. I just always forget to comment on this one. LOL

  3. Whats the saying. "those that can't do, teach"

    In this case he shouldn't be buying a book.

  4. I feel sorry for the fools who may purchase that book someday. Of course, the publishing houses may see write through the crap and write a big fact REJECT on the manuscript.

    Yours on the other hand need to be published! lol

  5. best part: he refused to go through the proper channels to get publication and sent his 5 lbs of hand typed BS to OPRAH and Dr. Phil and some other big names assuming they would read and get behind his "work". They were courteous enough to pay postage to return it to him. He is starting his own publishing company to avoid protocol and certain rejection. painful.

  6. Oh take The Accomplished Blogger (you do just fine in that area) off that list. Maybe you could add Disqus Expert instead.

    I'm sorry your FIL is a dumbass.

  7. Oh, I know the type all too well, and unfortunately not by marriage.

    I'd buy every title in your sarcastic book series!

  8. Perhaps it is better that your FIL restricts his presence in our household. I don't subscribe to the belief that all parents are good for their children. Some are just toxic. As for your titles? I LOVE each and everyone of them. I will need to tell you later which one is my favorite though. Can't decide just this sec.

  9. Okay, now that is just hilarity. I am so glad my daughter slept in this morning so that I could click through your comment to your blog to this post, in particular. Good stuff.

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