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Showing posts with label dumped. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dumped. Show all posts

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Uh Oh

This email excerpt from my husband. Love him.  (Image added by me)

Scary! After taking huge dump, I am sort of standing/sitting on a credenza in my boss's office discussing our "new action plan"(as if we had an old one). I look down and, to my horror, notice the brown smattering skid clinging to my pant leg.


At first I think its poop and have to scramble to get out of there(not easy with him). Once safe in the confines of my office, I conducted a comprehensive sniff check and began proper investigation. To my relief, I discover the remaining beans pasted to the bench of our break table where I ate my breakfast. Fuck I almost had a heart attack!!!!!.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

There's Something I Need to Tell You

Are there any words less alluring than:  "I need to talk to you" or "There is something I have to tell you"?  Seriously, Who says this??  Its not nice.


For me, these thoughts comes to mind:
  • I am being fired,dumped, or divorced.
  • I have something in my nose or teeth.
  • My breath needs help.
  • What did I do now?